Gone From My Sight
- Cathy Stenquist
- May 30
- 2 min read
Updated: 1 day ago
This week brought together grief and poetry in an unexpected way. The images in this poem, are ones I will hold onto for days.
One day last year, while visiting my friend Ann, her husband Carm complained that he badly needed a hair cut. Having helped a few of my elderly friends with their bushy eyebrows and graying locks, I offered my help. Soon I was setting up of my barber shop, once a month in their kitchen. There's something about cutting someone's hair that feels so close and intimate. I always feel humbled when I can help someone in this way.
While I combed and snipped, Carm would talk about the latest politics or the overide for the school budget that was"just not right!" He was a history teacher for many years with a loud and sometimes gruff voice, but I could see underneath his exterior a small soft spot. It snuck out once in a while in a smile, when I handed him my phone so he could see the results of my efforts and tell me if I missed anything.
Last Monday, while Ann was serving lunch, Carm suddenly collapsed, and after 4 days went home to God. He was 85 and at that age, things happen... But it was Ann's husband of 54 years and when the "two who become one" are separated, it is tough no matter how old or young.
At the funeral, Carm's brother read a beautiful poem, "Gone from My Sight"by Henry VanDyke, that had extra meaning for this couple who loved Maine. I though it was just beautiful and wanted to share it.
Happy Poetry Friday everyone.
Hope these images bring comfort to anyone missing someone they love.
Check out the other lovely poems here. Thank you Karen Edmisten for hosting this week!
How beautiful that you helped Carm and Ann with his haircuts, something so simple but so intimate. My condolences to Ann, and to you, and may he rest in peace.
Thanks for sharing "Gone from My Sight." I read it last year at my mother's funeral, and I love it. Hospice workers often share it with families too.
Cathy, your poignant posting and reflections from the funeral of a friend, brought back memories of reading this poem by Henry Van Dyke at a funeral some ten years back. It was in reading the poem that that memory relit. I have another Henry Van Dyke titled 'Life' nestled in an anthology called The Everyday Poet.' -it is equally evocative. The haircutting story added an essential human dimension to your relationship with your late friend and his wife. Your post further highlights the immense breadth and power poetry possesses. Thank you for this important life story.
Cathy, thank you so much for sharing this very special moment of a haircut for Carm and being there when he collapsed. I am reminded of the Ram Das saying that I've heard more and more lately that we are all "just walking each other home." What a honor for you to be with Anne and Carm at that particular moment of their walk together. I cannot think of anyone with a more gentle touch with a comb or humor for that day. God bless you for that time with them and sharing with us. What a beautiful poem. I'm so glad you've shared it with us.
Gone from my sight is a beautiful title for this poem of grief.